Absurdity Jam

It's a sham. A utter, complete sham.

Nothing begins on January First. Nothing.

It's not even the beginning of a new planetary cycle. That would be the Winter Solstice, which this year was December 21st? Why don't we celebrate the new year on that day? Probably because it would draw attention from Christmas, which wasn't actually the day Jesus was born. But I digress.

Every year we watch the ball drop. We listen to Dick Clark even though we all know he's always sucked. We sing Auld Lang Syne even though most of us haven't a fucking clue as to the words.

And the New Year's resolutions. Those fucking New Year's resolutions. The idea that someone would wait as much as (in the case of some I could mention) an extra three months to, say, quit smoking is really quite insipid. Furthermore, the New Year's resolution puts whatever the fuck it is you're vowing up on a pedastal. Unnecessary.

And don't get me started on that countdown to the New Year bullshit that the entire world does in turn as their time zones cross the threshold. Guess what! There's going to be a leap second this year! Your countdown will be wrong!

It's a sham. A total sham.

But who cares? The Stooges are on all night. They're almost never on TV anymore.

And so what if January 1st is a meaningless date? It's a day where we can be certain that there will be a party, regardless of religion (unless you're a Jehovah's Witness, in which case I've probably pissed you off at some point in this blog).

It is the time to put aside your scruples and have crazy fun, even if you're an antigonistic cynic (or a cynical antagonist). We need every excuse we can get. It carries my stamp of approval, despite the bullshit attatched. Not that you really needed to hear any of this from me.

Happy New Year, everyone.

Shear craziness in the middle of finals for no other reason than no one else has written anything here for some time. Do you people really think I have time for this? I am after all a busy woman, with the entire city to enthrall me and a stack of books and papers to go through. I’m slightly foul of temper too as fifty-percent, if not more, of the people I speak to at other colleges are out……………the rest will be out by Tuesday and I am stuck until Thursday. What is that about anyway?

I believe that it is best for me to take a stand on what is often perceived as internet stalking. It matters not that the invasion of privacy that occurs in these cases may be just that and not a physical threat. What matters is the perception there of.

In other words, when you read someone’s blog and decide to find out other information about that person, even if it is “just for the sake of curiosity” you become a creepy stalker. Indeed you may not be a “real” stalker but who is to know that for a fact.


In blog land you can be sure there are limits as to how far people want to go, how much information they want to divulge. You need to respect the unnatural boundaries, except what is given and expect no more.

It’s similar to a love affair…...it is just an affair; it is not a marriage. Enjoy what it gives you but do not try to take it further. It is not meant to be what it isn’t and it is selfish of you to try to take it to the place it was not meant to go.

We all know that Iraq had weapons of mass destruction at one time. We know because they came from us. A deal hatched by some of the same people at the upper echelons of the Bush Administration, it is important to note. But now that we're in there, there's none to be found. Something had to have happened to them, but what?

I've figured it out.

Saddam was sitting in his favorite palace one day, thinking about how fucking good he had it. An enormous supply of oil, huge palaces and countless servants and concubines, an entire nation of people pissing themselves with fear that they might incite his anger...

And on top of that, he was untouchable. No one in or around the Middle East wanted to fuck with him, thanks to those nasty weapons he was sitting on. And the major powers? They needed a reason to start trouble, and he wasn't giving it to them. But it wasn't all sunshine and happiness. Those UN weapons inspectors were starting to be a pain in the ass, all poking around in his shit and knocking on the palace gates. He wouldn't be able to hold them off for long.

Those WMDs were starting to cause a problem, which really sucks for him because he wasn't going to use them, anyways. Using them would start a war, and he'd get his ass trounced. No, his purpose in keeping them was so that others would know he had them and thus they shouldn't fuck with him. Get rid of the WMDs and he was vulnerable. Keep them and he might have a war on his hands. He needed a third option.

After careful consideration, he realized that he didn't really need the weapons themselves, he just needed people to think he had them. So he destroyed them, covertly. Meanwhile, he defied the weapons inspectors at every turn until he was done. As long as they found nothing but didn't trust the result, he was golden. No one would go to war without proof, right?

The problem came when Bush officials demanded evidence that he destroyed them. At that point Saddam realized that he was fucked, and went and hid in a hole.

And that's how it happened