Thursday, February 09, 2006 

Valentine's Day: You should have seen it coming

I said that I would give my thoughts on Valentine's Day.

There is an expectation that I have likely built up in my presence online, that as a snarky dude who hates commercialism and is perpetually single, I should be a frothing ball of rage about it.

And don't get me wrong. Also, I hate the wave of pink that greets me when I walk into a store. And I do often have the desire to inflict physical and spiritual harm upon the people who put forth in advertising that a dude cannot get lovin'no matter what if he doesn't shell out big time on V-Day. Can we all say, "self-fufilling prophecy?"

Whores.

Though, there is an even more flagrantly false holiday that exists in some parts. In 1923, the National Confectioners' Association tried to create a holiday called Candy Day. It fell through, as consumer's weren't quite that gullible. However, the next year, the holiday was given new life under the name Sweetest Day, which is even nowadays celebrated in the midwest on the third Saturday of October as a sort of Valintine's Day part deux.

I'm not, however, entirely opposed to the idea of a holiday to celebrate love. I just think its a bit unbalanced. I am therefore in favor of a holiday being created to celebrate spite. There would be greeting cards filled with harsh invectives, and candies that cause unsavory side-effects. It would be a day to loose all of the pent-up aggression held towards others (especially exes). A celebration of intelligent antagonism.

Makes me sad because I know it'll never happen