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Thursday, February 09, 2006 

Valentine's Day: You should have seen it coming

I said that I would give my thoughts on Valentine's Day.

There is an expectation that I have likely built up in my presence online, that as a snarky dude who hates commercialism and is perpetually single, I should be a frothing ball of rage about it.

And don't get me wrong. Also, I hate the wave of pink that greets me when I walk into a store. And I do often have the desire to inflict physical and spiritual harm upon the people who put forth in advertising that a dude cannot get lovin'no matter what if he doesn't shell out big time on V-Day. Can we all say, "self-fufilling prophecy?"

Whores.

Though, there is an even more flagrantly false holiday that exists in some parts. In 1923, the National Confectioners' Association tried to create a holiday called Candy Day. It fell through, as consumer's weren't quite that gullible. However, the next year, the holiday was given new life under the name Sweetest Day, which is even nowadays celebrated in the midwest on the third Saturday of October as a sort of Valintine's Day part deux.

I'm not, however, entirely opposed to the idea of a holiday to celebrate love. I just think its a bit unbalanced. I am therefore in favor of a holiday being created to celebrate spite. There would be greeting cards filled with harsh invectives, and candies that cause unsavory side-effects. It would be a day to loose all of the pent-up aggression held towards others (especially exes). A celebration of intelligent antagonism.

Makes me sad because I know it'll never happen

I was looking at my last years Valentine post to see what I could come up with for V day.

Well now I don't have to.


I like the spite day idea even though I don't really have all that much spite in me.

I usually just ignore it if I can.

We could probably make a bundle off spite day though Wombat......let's talk.

isnt that april fool's day? or couldnt you disguise some spite as a sarcastic april fool's joke? but yes spite day sounds fantastic i could make homecards for everyone i hate, wouldnt that be fun?

What bugs me about Valentines Day isn't really the idea behind it.. I think in some instances, a person might need a reminder. I hate it, because that day, or really that week, is roughly how much time elapses since Christmas where I'm inclined to get the urge to do something nice for my girlfriend. Neither of us really care much about the day per se, but it's hard to declare a thoughtful gift or gesture near february 14th without it being considered a valentines day gift. Luckily when I do it in any other month, there's no holiday like that that suggests my intentions aren't simply pure and not holiday-pressure related.

That sounds like Festivus to me. Maybe it could be celebrated once a month.

Valentine Scrooge... :) Fine, I'll take my gift back... lol! ;) Just teasing ya!

Alice: Consider yourself on the commitee. to wit, there are two other members.

Mick: Well, you're of a rare breed. Maybe you could distinguish it from V-Day somehow?

Indeterminacy: If it was every month then it wouldn't be on the same day each month. The day would be chosen at random and announced the night before on a website and thus add to the anarchic nature of it.

Shayna: I think my gift to you was proof that I am no scrooge.

Crys: Well, I think there is a way to defend it from a single guy's perspective, but keep in mind I'm in "Devil's Advocate" mode.

Basically if a single guy has his shit together he can pick up all manner of rebounds who don't want to be alone on Valentine's Day.

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